So many times people have the notion that intentional parenting involves being permissive and not being disciplined with your child but this is where they get things wrong because at the heart of intentional parenting is discipline.
In fact, without being disciplined you cannot parent intentionally. Intentional parenting centers around discipline but the real question is “Do we even understand what discipline is”. Discipline is not only good for children but also essential for their health and well-being, discipline is as vital for health even as food is vital for health.
Without discipline, children lack the necessary tools to navigate love, relationships, and challenges in life and lack self-discipline so they do not have respect for themselves and others. Discipline is about putting systems in your parenting , when you do this there are troubles that you will never have.
So What Is Discipline?
Discipline is not about creating conflicts with your child or lashing out in anger when you do this you miss the essence of disciplining anyone. Discipline when done correctly is not about trying to control your child but showing them how to control their behaviors.
Discipline is not about controlling your child for doing something wrong, discipline is about setting clear parameters and consequences for breaking rules so they can learn how to discipline themselves. The aim of discipline is to be self-disciplined. When you teach discipline in the real sense of it you will not struggle but when you teach discipline in a haphazard sense you miss it.
Discipline is not screaming, beating, and yelling, discipline is teaching your children skills and getting them to practice them.
Discipline is structure, if you do not understand structure, systems, principles and routines you are not disciplined.
WHY YOUR DISCIPLINARY STRATEGY IS NOT WORKING?
- You Do Not Understand Discipline:
- You Do Not Understand Your Child: When you parent by assumption you do not understand that every human being is different. You need to be careful not to learn parenting from people who do not understand parenting. Intentional parenting follows a goal, unintentional parenting follows the crowd. During the “Understanding Your Child’s Learning Style Course, I taught parents that you do not discipline a kinesthetic learner the same way you discipline a visual learner. When you do this you are doing the one size fits all type of parenting. Do you understand who you are parenting?
3. You Think Yelling, Beating and Shaming Are Disciplinary Strategies: One of the reasons your disciplinary strategies are not working is because they are quick fixes. Parents who hit, tell, and threaten are lazy parents because intentional parenting takes a lot of thinking
4. You Are Always Yelling and They Are Not Learning: When you yell, you shut down the part of the brain that learns and your child cannot understand what you are saying. If there is something you want to do, it is to take out yelling and shouting from your parenting because it doesn’t serve you.
5. You Don’t Understand Strategies Used For A Child At Each Stage: Do you know that there are strategies you need at each stage of parenting, the way you raise infants is not the same way you raise toddlers or preteens. For my journey, my husband and I are always recreating our disciplinary strategies.
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Effects Of Negative Discipline
- They become Unhappy
- They are deficient in important life skills.
- They are more likely to engage in negative behavior that is harmful and potentially dangerous for themselves and others
- They eventually become unhappy
- They become willful, selfish, and generally unpleasant.
- They will lack self-control and social skills
Effects Of The Discipline That Works
- Your children are more responsible and they enjoy being good and helpful.
- They are more self-confident
- They are pleasant to be around
- They have more self-control and self-sufficient
- Their Social Skills is Top Notch
- They know that they are accountable for their mistakes and misbehavior, so they are more likely to make good decisions because they want to not because they are afraid of their punishment.
Are you still thinking of joining the Yelling To Calm Challenge?It’s just 2 days to this transformational journey.I guarantee this Challenge will change your life as a parent.
•If you are a parent that struggles with anger, you need this Challenge?
•If you have being Yelling at your children and actually get tired at some point you need to join this challenge.
•If you are looking for alternative ways to modify your child’s behaviour without shouting down everyone, you need this Challenge.
Join me for this challenge as I share with you how I walked through my own journey from being a yeller to a calm Parent.In this 5 days Challenge will give you a jumpstart on your journey to tame your temper.In 5 days, you WILL notice a change in how often you yell at your children.
Pay N7,999 to 0509494057, GTBank, The intentional Payment Academy. After payment, send your full name, and proof of payment to WhatsApp 08129687040. If I can ditch yelling, you too can. Come let’s parent with Peace and Calm.